Take heart weary momma. I know you've just changed the thirtieth diaper of the day and you're wondering what the Lord is accomplishing through your life. You're in a holding pattern right now. You are growing and learning here. You won't always be in this season. The Lord does have a plan for your life. He sees the dream in your heart. He will bring it to fruition but not until you're groomed for it. It may seem uncomfortable right now but refinement always is.............
Have you ever met someone who seemed to be born with innate charisma? There's just something about the way they speak. They are dynamic, inspiring and just easy to listen to. It seems like they are destined for the spotlight, destined to lead others. I've met some people like this in my life. Their passion and zeal were almost infectuous and prompted great changes in my life.
On the flip side, have you ever witnessed the damage caused by a charismatic person who hadn't taken the time to cultivate the character required to sustain them in their current position? I bet each of us could name a person we once respected or admired, who turned out to be less morally equipped than we'd hoped they'd be. I'm sure if we took a poll everyone would agree, in order of importance, character wins over charisma every time! So exactly how is character shaped? While there are many variables it is primarily shaped through diligence, time, tests, and trials.
During the early years of being a new mom and tending to babies I felt like the Lord had me in a perpetual holding pattern. I felt like I was flying around in circles, day by day, accomplishing nothing truly important for his kingdom. I was armed with lots of zeal and a big dream the Lord had placed in my heart. I often wondered why the Lord wouldn't "clear me for landing." Why was this dream burning in my heart if He wasn't planning on bringing it to fruition.
Now looking back on those long tedious years I realize the Lord was cultivating my character. He was sanding and polishing my rough edges. I learned a lot about myself during those years of feeling very isolated. I learned even more about the Lord and how much His friendship means to me. The Lord taught me a lot about serving others by humbling my heart in that season of life. He loved me too much to let me begin walking in my calling before my character could sustain me. Now as my babies are growing older and needing my attention less and less, I see the Lord beginning to move me closer to fulfilling some of the big dreams I've long held in my heart. I'm thankful He took the time to teach me and groom my character before moving me deeper into His service. I'm thankful for the way He continues to teach me by convicting me of new areas in my life to work on. I know He will continue transforming me into His image, so that I may be "without offense" as it says in Philippians 1:9-11. I can't say for sure if He's officially cleared me for landing but I can certainly feel the plane descending and the altitude beginning to change. I'm hopeful that when the plane lands I'll be ready to hit the ground running.
As for you dear sister in Christ, your plane will land someday too. The Lord didn't place that dream in your heart for nothing. Be patient during this season of life. You are growing and learning here. Embrace this part of His beautiful process.
This I pray that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ, being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.
Philippians 1:9-11
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